Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
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man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
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There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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