Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
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if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
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We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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