Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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