My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
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