A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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