Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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