The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize