She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
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