I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize