so explain again why im purple
no
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize