Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize