So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
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She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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