I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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