I just threw up on my dentist
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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