Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize