If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I love you.
Bad choice
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize