I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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