There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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