I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize