It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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