Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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