she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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