found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize