i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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