In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I need water and some morals
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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