I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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