If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
50% drunk capacity currently
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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