Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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