Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize