We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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