I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
tell me about the eggs
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