Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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