YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
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