i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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