hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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