I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
i out mim tonsoeep
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