If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize