Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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