You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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