My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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