She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize