My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
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Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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