So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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