TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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