Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I think a kid would responsible me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize