that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
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I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
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