so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize