we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize