That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize