Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize